Reviewed: October 4, 2007
Reviewed by: Mark Smith

Publisher
SouthPeak Interactive

Developer
Evolved Games

Released: September 5, 2007
Genre: Sports
Players: 1-2

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1.7

Supported Features:

It took me less than 60 seconds to recognize this game for what it was…a total and direct rip-off of Pocket Pool; a low budget M-rated piece of trash released on the PSP earlier this year. Strip away the scantily clad models, raunchy dialogue and not-so-witty double entrandes, and you take a crappy M-rated game and make an equally crappy E-rated game. Now you can piss off kids and adults.

My only hope was that the designers had at least adopted some nice use of the Wii-mote to replicate the movement of the cue stick. Those dreams were quickly sunk in the side pocket. The game controls like crap…you don’t even need motion sensing, as the game really makes no real use of anything specific to the Wii once you leave the menus.

Consider this. You can aim your cue by pointing the remote but this is so awkward that you’ll quickly settle for the analog stick on the nunchuk. The C button cycles through various camera views, most of which have HUD items blocking your view of the shot. Once you have your shot lined up you push the B button on the remote, but instead of making a back and forth shooting motion with the remote (like you would expect on a Wii game) you set a power meter with the analog stick on the nunchuk then flick the remote at the screen to strike the ball.

Perhaps I wouldn’t mind the shoddy controls as much if there were at least an intelligent pool game lurking beneath this 1980’s interface. Sadly, the game sucks on every level. Let’s start with three levels of physics, which dictate how fast the balls move on the felt. I’ve played on brand new tables (slow) and old worn out tables (fast) and the difference of speed and momentum is noticeable but not as vast as represented in Pool Party.

On slow speed you will be lucky to make a ball hit a cushion on the break with maximum power (a foul by the way), and on medium speed all the balls slow down quite quickly and unnaturally like brakes are being applied. Of course if you ever wondered what it would be like to play pool on the moon you can opt for fast speed where you might need to recharge the batteries in your Wii-mote before the balls stop moving. There is no happy median and nothing that borders on reality.

If speed weren’t issue enough the actually math used to calculate angles is wrong. I loved geometry in school (probably part of why I love pool) and even one of Jeff Foxworthy’s 5th graders (oops, I just dated this review with a pop-culture reference) can tell you that if you drive a ball into a cushion at 45-degrees it will exit at an opposite 45-degrees (90-degrees total). So why is it that my balls are flying around at all crazy angles?

Even more interesting is watching the computer play. First off, the computer will “think” forever unless you interrupt it by hitting the A button. I’d love to see the calculations going on behind the scenes. It has to be something worthy of NASA’s mainframes because once the computer actually take a shot it is pure geometric magic. There can be a ball six inches from the hole with the cue ball two feet from that ball and the computer will literally shoot in the opposite direction, ricocheting the ball off two, three, or even four rails before striking the ball and sinking it.

Despite the trick-shot mentality of the computer AI the game is sadly lacking any trick-shot mode, or a career mode, or any type of structured gameplay for that matter. You merely select and play a single game of your choosing. There is no character creation or development or any real substance to the gameplay. There is also little adherence to the rules of pool, especially when it comes to fouls and ball-in-hand. I can play more advanced pool games on my cell phone.

The characters are purely 2D pop-up art. You’ll see nobody walking around the table other than a ghostly cue stick. The HUD is way too large and usually blocks your shot forcing you to cycle through several angles to aim. There are several venues, most of which are quite generic, and you can unlock new sets of balls and cloth designs for the tables, none of which really add anything to the experience.

Sound effects consist of a cue striking a ball, more balls clacking around, and the occasional plunk if you manage to defy Pool Party physics and actually sink a ball. There is also some forgettable music that is best forgotten. They don’t even bother to theme it to the location.